“Keeping Secrets” – Ch:9 -‘A new beginning’

A new beginning….

I hang up the phone feeling a warm glow inside. The conversation is a simple one with many friendly words exchanged and both sides definitely on the same side. Building a new friendship takes time and commitment from both people, with a genuine interest in each other. I am committed more than I ever thought possible.

Many times in the past it has been all about me. To play the friendship game, it needs to also be about the other person. Even though I am nearly a teenager, I am still learning how to be a friend. It is important to truly listen, trust in my friend, trust in myself and not to keep secrets. Keeping secrets can create pain, more pain than is necessary.

The doorbell rang and I hear the twins racing each to answer it first. The continual competition between them usually got on my nerves but not today.

Sam has voiced her opinion on the phone, not about anything too serious but she actually voiced her own opinion. I feel comfortable with our friendship as I think it is a true friendship, one that will grow into a forever friendship.

“Alexx, Alexx, it’s for you”, scream Bree. “It’s your boyfriend.”

By the time I am standing at the front door, face to face with Brendon, my embarrassment has peaked, resulting in hot beetroot red face, sweaty palms and a complete loss for words. Little sisters have to be the most annoying people in the entire world but I wasn’t going to make it worse by screaming like a lunatic in front of Brendon.

“Hi Alexx,” says Brendon, actually looking a little embarrassed.

His face wasn’t as red as mine, more like a soft peach colour. He stands with his arms folded in front of his body as if protecting himself against my manic little sisters, who are watching.

“Go away girls,” I demand as nicely as possible. Silently we stand in front of each other until the twins finally leave us alone.

“Umm, hi Brendon,” I say, looking towards the ground at my foot, making a figure eight trying to talk my body into relaxing just a little.

“I wanted to come over to say thank you,” he says, unfolding his arms, obviously relaxing now that the twins have left and it’s only us.

“For what?” I ask curiously, finally lifting my head to connect with his dark brown eyes.

“You have been so cool with Roxie. She told me everything. How you stuck up for her and how great she thinks you are.”

“Oh….well she is my friend.”

“Yeah I know but I know what girls like Poppy are like and I just wanted to thank you. I think you’re pretty cool too.”

His hands pull me towards him, strong but delicate. With such urgency his lips met mine, lock with mine for the first time. I allow him to lead me, direct me in my first kiss. His lips are so tender as they touch mine. So sweet his scent, a smell I have never experienced and will never forget. As swiftly as the kiss began, the kiss ends. I am mesmerised, lost in the moment, feeling dizzy from overwhelming excitement I am experiencing.

The boy I have wanted to share my first kiss with has given me my wish. I stare at him as he turns to leave, nothing else to say, no words could invade my thoughts at this moment. The moment has passed in reality but I stand, waiting by the door, waiting for the moment to pass from my body.

Every hair is electrified, standing on end causing my body to tingle. Every thought racing through my mind is happy, wonderful, in a place I want to remain forever. I am growing up and my life is being controlled by me. The decisions I have made are my own decisions – good or bad and I am beginning to realise I have to own them. This is the best consequence from my decision to be a true and loyal friend.

The time has presented itself without my controlling. I know now is the perfect time to open up to Mum and Dad with my inner thoughts. I can’t keep up the act anymore that their arguing is okay. It isn’t okay with me and I need to have this matter sorted out and now is a perfect time.

As my mind floats back from the clouds where Brendon has left me, my body goes in to automatic mode. My courage is stable, my confidence restored and my ability in always being the person I want to be at its peak, the time is now.

“Mum”, I shout down the hallway, “I need to talk to you. It’s very important.”

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